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Mmm... Sweet, juicy side-hugs...

Oh, yeah... Oh, keep- Wait! Slow down! No don't-!

Oh, God... I'm sorry, baby, I usually last longer. I swear. It's just that... That was the best fucking Christian side-hug anyone's ever given me.

The question of "What's so absurd it could finally make me post something on this blog?" has been answered. The video above is apparently real, and taken from this conference. When, I haven't the foggiest, but I don't think that's important. Where do I start with this...

1) They don't want you to give/receive normal hugs to/from friends and neighbors, but they don't have a problem with a priest giving you a front-hug? Not sure about this one...

2) If they're trying to be street -which I assume is what they're aiming for, although it may be the "street" of 1995- wouldn't you think they'd try to avoid a phrase like "rough rider" without completely understanding it? The phrase, "I'm a rough rider, filled up with Christ's love" has a very different meaning in a "street" context.

3) When did hugging become such a sexual act? Have I missed this? I hug my grandma and grandpa at Thanksgiving, but it doesn't mean I want to fuck them.

4) How condescending can you possibly fucking be? You're trying to lure kids into your warped version of Christianity with a rap song? Absurd and disingenuous. Hugs are bad, but the sounds of police sirens and gunshots, which are insinuations of violence and murder, are a-okay for a supposedly Christian concert?

5) Do you see how embarrassed the black guy in the background is?! Hahahaha! I figure someone asked him to come on stage for a minute, and now once he's realized why they wanted him up there -so that a bunch of lame white guys can imitate black guys without seeming racist- he's so pissed off that he's just contemplating his revenge.

6) You know they're fucking those dancers...

7) Mark 10: 13-16 - "People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.' And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them." If hugging is so sinful and wrong, just what exactly are you saying about Jesus?

8) No Christian rap act is any good. So stop it.

just stumbled upon your blog, great video! i love all the bullshit that churches/youth groups go through now-a-days to "brainwash" kids into thinking christ is cool. a bunch of white kids rapping just makes me laugh.

not sure if you noticed, but it seems the chorus tune for this song is a blatant rip off of "The Imperial March (Darth Vader's Theme)" i don't think this falls under "fair use" and i find it quite hilarious that of all people, a church group decided to use this. is this not a violation of one of their commandments?

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